Thursday, October 11, 2007

My mom and I have this secret pact

When I went under the knife to have my thyroid cancer removed, I made my mom promise me something. You see the prospect of death is a scary thing.

Not because I'm afraid of what's to come after, or that I'm afraid to leave my family behind, but there is nothing more terrifying than leaving this world behind and having other women come into your house and clean it.

I live in a very supportive church community, and the first thing the women would do is to come and give my house a thorough going over. You know, so it would sparkle for family and friends.

And while I'm sure they only have the best intentions, my cleanliness standards may not be up to their snuff. After all, my kids and I clean together, and they're still learning.

There are the more public parts of my home, and for the most part they are clean (although the kitchen counter is a bit cluttered). And then there are the more private areas: bathrooms (I have a boy), closets, inside the oven, under the fridge, and even gasp! the lint trap in the dryer - I don't want to talk about those, let alone have other women clean them and know all their intimate details).

So, here's the pact: my mom has promised me that she'll stall them long enough to get the job done her self (with the help of my sisters), and once my house is gleaming and sparkling from top to bottom....

she'll let them in and I'll die with my dignity intact.

Sound good?


Summer said...


Cocoa said...

When I had Ira Joseph's mom and two younger sisters came up to watch the kids. They also did a deep cleaning of the house with Joseph's and the kids' help. I however was deeply embarrassed because, well, as you put it they new all the intimate details of the more private parts of my home. It stayed really clean for a long time though!

Heffalump said...

My sister in law cleaned our house once when we were on vacation. She had explicit instructions to clean nothing...just to water plants and feed pets. She invited D's divorced parents over, and his siblings and they cleaned. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. They even cleaned my bedroom. It still makes me want to cry. They also left little notes around the house like "Cleanliness is next to Godliness" and such. The horror! They will never have access to a key to my house again.

Corrie said...

cocoa - it's not so bad if it's your mom, but anyone else - yikes!

heff - they left notes? See that's just what I mean. My mom and I can chuckle about the "status" of my house, but it is not what I want people talking about when I'm gone.

"Did you see those baseboards? Tsk, tsk."

Oh the shame, the horror!

Corrie said...

Also, I have friends who use a cleaning service, yet they clean their house before the maids come.

What it the point of that?

b. said...

Uh, yeah.
I get that.

Corrie said...

b. kinda thought you would;)

Anonymous said...

That is just too funny!! I know how you feel!

Nora Bee said...

I used to have a cleaning service, and I TOTALLY cleaned before she arrived. Guilty! If my mom knew the first thing about cleaning I might make a similar pact. Alas, I am lost.

athena said...

i don't mind women coming into my house to clean because for the most part it's already clean. or maybe i would mind. for me there is nothing more terrifying than leaving this world behind and having another women come in my house to take my place.

Corrie said...

tirzah - maybe if my house was smaller...naah

nora - I would clean your house before the neighbors came - if I lived close to you.

athena - I suppose I hadn't thought that far ahead. Any woman who volunteers to take my place is amazing in my book.

That's not saying that I think I am, but I did have all this happen gradually and got used to things - if someone were to pick it, she's probably the kind of person I'd wish for...if I were to die, and uh, that's just not gonna happen. I'm stubborn like that.
Maybe once the baby is older, it'll stop looking like a tornado went through here.